Managing Toddler Troubles at Bedtime

Kids often pull out all the stops when it comes to avoiding bedtime, making it one of the most challenging times of day for many parents. Sleep routines are different for each family and are influenced by each child’s unique temperament. However, there are some proven sleep hygiene practices that support healthy sleep. This blog will explore how families can use these building blocks for a smoother bedtime routine. 

Building Blocks for Good Sleep 

Healthy sleep is essential for child development and family well-being. Sleep hygiene refers to the habits that influence sleep quality. For kids, establishing healthy sleep habits early on can benefit them for life. Without good sleep, children can become cranky, struggle to self-regulate and face challenges in learning environments.  Here are some important sleep tips: 

• Wind down: By the end of the day, our body and mind need to wind down. A warm bath and story time is a good transition for bedtime. Perhaps you have some favorite songs or family rituals that mark lights out.  These sleep cues will help your little one drift off more easily. 
• Turn down the lights: Your child needs a comfortable environment that supports healthy sleep. Dim their sleeping space, set the room to a comfortable temperature, minimize noise and distractions, and limit comfort toys to one or two. 
• Disconnect from devices: Blue light emitted from screens is unhealthy for adults and children before bedtime. Switch screens off at least 1 hour before bedtime and aim for bedrooms to be screen-free. 
• Healthy eating habits: Avoid high levels of sugar and caffeine, especially in the lead-up to bedtime.   
• Learn the signs of tiredness: Toddlers communicate in many ways, and the non-verbal cues are just as valuable as the verbal ones. Rubbing eyes, getting grumpy and clumsy, and hyperactivity can all be signs that they are done for the day.  
• Be consistent: Life happens – there are birthdays and holidays but keeping a regular and consistent bedtime routine will help your child and family sleep well. Kids thrive on predictability, so knowing what is expected as dusk falls is one of the key aspects of good sleep hygiene. 

Why Does My Toddler Cry at Bedtime? 

If bedtime crying has become routine, it might be time for a new sleep strategy. Check for factors such as room temperature or even uncomfortable pajamas – tightness or tags can be a trigger for many children. Consider if they may be getting unwell or having a growth spurt. Take the bigger picture into consideration – stressors such as a new baby (or one on the way), changes in the home or family, or school challenges, can all influence behavior. Alternatively, they could be overloaded by a stimulating event like going to a movie or theme park. Help your child share their feelings by reading picture books about life changes or do some simple breathing exercises. And, of course, never underestimate the power of a big hug.  

How Do I Help My Toddler Manage Separation Anxiety at Bedtime?  

It's common for toddlers (ages 2 to 3) to experience bedtime anxiety. There are a variety of sleep training methods that families can adopt to best navigate bedtime. You may choose to sit at your child’s bedside until they fall asleep. Others prefer to provide a night light, stay until your child is calm, and step out while they are awake. What works for one family may not work for another – it will come down to family circumstances, temperament (of the parent and child!), and personal approaches to parenting. The most important thing to remember is that your child is young – they need your support and reassurance to navigate and develop good sleep habits.  

The Importance of Staying Calm 

Setting boundaries and staying calm during bedtime is crucial. If you start feeling upset, step away for a few minutes. Your partner or caregiver can step in and continue the routine to show a united front. Remind yourself that this phase will pass more quickly if you remain calm. 

Establishing a Consistent Napping Routine 

Toddlers (12 months to 3 years) need between 12-13 hours sleep per day according to the CDC. As they grow they may shift from two naps to one nap. If bedtime is later than expected, consider dropping the second nap. Try moving the single nap later in the day and start bedtime earlier if they show signs of tiredness. Choose calmer activities in the afternoon to help with this transition. 

Seeking Professional Help 

If your little one has not adjusted to a developmentally typical sleeping routine and is fighting sleep or waking frequently overnight, you may consider sleep training. Sleep specialists are trained to look at your current routine and support you with interventions that suit your circumstances and child’s needs.  

In Conclusion 

Set a consistent family routine and stick to it. Be gracious if your little one is cranky, and try to think about the day from a toddler perspective – what may have worn them out? Consider a picture schedule to point at and let them touch and say what is next. Children thrive on routine and predictability. Remember that even within the same family, your children's sleep needs may be different from one another. Managing this can be challenging and requires planning.  

Parenting can be exhausting and poor sleep, or lack thereof, can take a toll on parental mental health and well-being. Find solutions that work for you, and if you are feeling overwhelmed it may be worth seeking professional support for your child’s sleeping challenges and your own well-being.